What Would You Do?
So I was on the plane going to visit Andrew in Mountain View, CA (a.k.a. Silicon Valley). Unfortunately I had been sick the previous week and was still suffering from sinus congestion and sore throat. Anyhoo…the plane ride was the usual spiel…take-off, drinks, bad movie (My Super Ex-Girlfriend), cramped hospitality seating, people leaned back all the way in the seats in front of you, people kicking your chair from the back. Gee, can you tell that I am not the biggest fan of flying long distances? Well, just as we were circling around the bay area, I suddenly had to sneeze…one of those repetitive ones. Then I had recalled that I couldn’t find any tissue prior to boarding so I had a small wad of tissue paper rolled up in my jacket pocket. SCORE! As I went to wipe my nose, a crimson red drop rolled down my upper lip and splattered against the white, 1ply, Pearson Airport toilet paper. ACK! I started to wad up little toilet paper corks, trying to use what little I had sparingly…let me just say that this stuff ain’t Bounty. By the time I was around to my 3rd toilet paper cork, I had no tissue left and the stewardess was walking around to pick up garbage while we began our descent into San Francisco Airport. CRAP! Luckily there was an empty seat between me and the aisle guy so I just kept facing the window, hoping that this horrifying experience would be over soon.
I finally took out the last and final ball of blood when I had thought that my bleeding had stopped. Instead…the worst possible thing happened. This huge glob…I mean HUGE glob of snotty, bloody mucus came out of my nose, connected to the tissue! I swear, I could have stretched it out like you do with cheese on a hot, piping pizza. YUCK. I was all out of tissues, I had blood all over my face, trapped in my seat, with a stewardess 2 rows away about to ask me if I had any garbage.
So what would you do?
A) Cup your hand over your face, climb over the other passenger, and run to the washroom where you could clean up?
B) Jump out the emergency hatch because nothing is worth that kind of embarrassment?
C) Wait until the stewardess comes, giver her your bloody tissues and ask for some more?
D) Pinch your nose until you get off the plane and head straight to the washroom?
E) Pretend you are a film special effects coordinator and pretend that this is one of those “special effects”?
I’m sure you all could come up with some discreet ways to have gotten out of this situation. Me? Oh yeah, what did I do?
I didn’t want to risk embarrassment so I risked what some of you may think is a breech of hygienic conduct.
I yanked off the sock on my right foot, wiped my nose and face with it and continued to hold it there while sniffing the blood back as much as I could. Yes, that’s right, my SOCK. Ok, it wasn’t REALLY a dirty sock or anything. I carry around a pair of travel socks because my feet swell in my shoes when flying so when I take them off, my feet get really cold, thus “travel socks”. But I’ll admit, they did have a faint sock odour to them…
Well, lucky for me the bleeding stopped once we touched ground and once the doors opened I ran to the nearest washroom to wash my face and was all fresh and clean to see Andrew waiting on the other side of the gate.
Man, I think I deserve to be in a Mentos commercial, or at least that Foo Fighters Video…hehehe.
I finally took out the last and final ball of blood when I had thought that my bleeding had stopped. Instead…the worst possible thing happened. This huge glob…I mean HUGE glob of snotty, bloody mucus came out of my nose, connected to the tissue! I swear, I could have stretched it out like you do with cheese on a hot, piping pizza. YUCK. I was all out of tissues, I had blood all over my face, trapped in my seat, with a stewardess 2 rows away about to ask me if I had any garbage.
So what would you do?
A) Cup your hand over your face, climb over the other passenger, and run to the washroom where you could clean up?
B) Jump out the emergency hatch because nothing is worth that kind of embarrassment?
C) Wait until the stewardess comes, giver her your bloody tissues and ask for some more?
D) Pinch your nose until you get off the plane and head straight to the washroom?
E) Pretend you are a film special effects coordinator and pretend that this is one of those “special effects”?
I’m sure you all could come up with some discreet ways to have gotten out of this situation. Me? Oh yeah, what did I do?
I didn’t want to risk embarrassment so I risked what some of you may think is a breech of hygienic conduct.
I yanked off the sock on my right foot, wiped my nose and face with it and continued to hold it there while sniffing the blood back as much as I could. Yes, that’s right, my SOCK. Ok, it wasn’t REALLY a dirty sock or anything. I carry around a pair of travel socks because my feet swell in my shoes when flying so when I take them off, my feet get really cold, thus “travel socks”. But I’ll admit, they did have a faint sock odour to them…
Well, lucky for me the bleeding stopped once we touched ground and once the doors opened I ran to the nearest washroom to wash my face and was all fresh and clean to see Andrew waiting on the other side of the gate.
Man, I think I deserve to be in a Mentos commercial, or at least that Foo Fighters Video…hehehe.
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